Tuesday, November 18, 2014

2-5-2008 spiritual warfare Part 2 part 2: the start of the "ordinary demonic", not enough sex within marriage

That being said, as well, one of the ways the enemy likes to work is just plain old sin. Just loves to get people to sin and ultimately his goal is always twofold: to get the Christian to have false doctrine and to live a false lifestyle. That's his goal. He wants you to believe things that are lies and he wants you to live in a sinful way so that you are a bad witness for the Gospel, ultimately leading to your death. That's his goal, always. John 8, Jesus says that Satan is the father of lies (so, false doctrine and lies, he's all about) and he's a murder (Jesus says in John 8 he [Satan] just loves death). In Proverbs it says "All who hate me love death." Satan hates God and he loves death. False doctrine [is] the death of truth. False living [is] the death of holiness. Ultimately your own death, that's his goal.

Now in saying this let me start with the ordinary demonic. When people think of the demonic they tend to think of the extraordinary demonic like Rosemary's Baby, bizzare Catholic exorcisms which find no rootedness in Scripture, those kinds of things. The ordinary demonic is very subtle. I've got a list of examples of ordinary demonic on page 3.

Sexual sin. 1 Corinthians 7:5 it says that a married couple that is Christian should have sexual relations frequently. They shouldn't deny one another but by mutual consent and for a time otherwise Satan (chapter 7, verse 5 of 1 Corinthians 7 says), Satan will get in there and destroy everything.

How many of you would think that a couple that doesn't have enough sex is experiencing demonic spiritual warfare? It's true. How many Christian marriages divorce?  Well, statistically, more than those who are not Christian. When non-Christians can work it out a rate that is more successful than Christians that would indicate to me that Satan has really found a way to climb into bed between a husband and a wife and, in one way or another, cause devastation.

When I'm meeting with a couple and one of them, maybe it's the husband, says, "Well, my wife's not being very nice to me so I'm gonna deny her sex and until she's nice to me I'm gonna withhold it."  That's demonic.

The wife who says, "You know, I'm just never in the mood and, you know, I know you love me and we have a decent marriage and there's no reason I shouldn't have sex with you, but, I'm just not in the mood or, you know, I don't feel like, uh, giving it to you until you give something to me and it becomes a bartering chip in the relationship." That's demonic.
That's demonic.

To be sure, there are sex addicts in marriage who are unreasonable in their expectations of their spouse but what I'm talking about is the common situation where one person in the marriage wants to be intimate more often than the other and they're rejected, they become bitter,  Satan comes in and feeds that bitterness, baits the hook of their flesh with the temptation of the world, and all of a sudden Satan puts in front of them images and people and opportunities to lead them astray and to destroy everything.

It doesn't make anyone a victim. It doesn't make anyone a victim because we all of our own choosing choose sin but it does mean you're giving Satan an opportunity to literally sleep between you and your spouse. I wanna just burn that image in your mind. I tell couples this when I meet with them, "Husband, wife, are you having sex enough? What's your sexual relationship like?" We deal with things outside of the bedroom like love, respect and intimacy and connection but if those things are in order, are you having enough sex? And almost invariably, I have rarely have had a counseling appointment where they both say, "I'm satisfied with the frequency and the freedom of our sexual relationship." Almost invariably one person says, "Yeah, I think we're fine." and the other says, "I'm totally frustrated. It's not very often, it's not very fun, it's very predictable, it's not satisfying, it's hard for me to rejoice in the wife of my youth [you know, the husband might say, Proverbs 5] it really is hard for me to rejoice."

Sometimes it's the wife saying, "He doesn't pursue me, he doesn't touch me, he doesn't desire me, he doesn't complement me. I've got OTHER men who complement me, I've got other men who pursue me emotionally. I've got other men who are desirous of me" and I said "Wow, Satan is here. He's at work."   Want you to have that image that a couple who is not having free, frequent intimacy when they go to bed just think of Satan lying in the bed between the two of them. That's what Paul's talking about in 1 Corinthians 7:5. It really is a big issue.

It's not just, "I'm more amorous than you are." it's "This is demonic." This is demonic.
As well, marriage between a Christian and a non-Christian. 2 Corinthians 6:15 Paul talks about what does light have to do with darkness? What does Jesus have to do with Belial (or Satan)? You say, "Well, nothing?"  Then why should a Christian marry a non-Christian? When a Christian marries a non-Christian do you know that's demonic? That's demonic, that's what Satan wants. See, Malachi 2, God wants godly offspring.  Christian, non Christian, they get married [and] have kids, Satan has an opportunity to bring to an end a legacy of godly offspring.

Single people, I take `em here all the time. They come in, "Oh, they believe in God, they love Jesus." Are they a Christian? Are you equally yoked? Do they have the same theological as you, are you on the same page?  Do you have the same vision for your life? "Well, no, but don't you think if I sleep with them that maybe they'll have a change of heart?" Probably not.  I've never seen a verse that says regeneration comes through fornication. Never seen that verse. "Well, if we get married it won't be such a big deal." Really? You're not going to agree on the authority of scripture; the glory of God (the purpose of your life is worship); the church you will attend; the friends you will have; the way you will resolve sin, like, a complete difference on all of those issues won't lead to a very difficult marriage? You being compromised in your witness, your faith, your love for God? Having a spouse you can't pray with, read bible with, confess sin to, grow in Jesus with, worship in holiness, participate in church? A spouse that isn't gonna read the Bible with your kids, pray with your kids because they [the unbelieving spouse] don't belong to Jesus? It's unbelievable. That's demonic.
[A] Christian dating a non-Christian is demonic. It's not just a lifestyle preference, it's demonic. It's the ORDINARY demonic. It's not EXtraordinary. People's heads are not spinning around on their neck, you know, their eyes bugging out of their head and deep voices coming out like the bizzare Hollywood movies. It's just Satan saying, "Hmm, I'll bait the hook with a non-Christian. Good enough, whatever it takes."

1 comment:

C. Stirling Bartholomew said...

MD is the last guy anybody should listen to on these topics. The idea that anyone would take him seriously on questions regarding relationships is enough to give one nightmares.