http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/199403/in-the-name-love?page=3
http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/199403/in-the-name-love?page=4
http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/199403/in-the-name-love?page=5
From my point of view, attachment theory also redefines the place of sexual behavior. For the past 50 years, we seem to have come to believe that sex is the essence of love relationships. That is not my experience in working with couples. Sex per sex is often but a small part of adult intimacy. Attachment theory tells us that the basic security in life is contact with other people. We need to be held, to be emotionally connected. I think that the most basic human experience of relatedness is two people—mother and child, father and child, two adults—seeing and holding each other, providing the safety, security, and feeling of human connectedness that for most, in the end, makes life meaningful. Many people use sex as a way to create or substitute for the sense of connection they are needing. I would guess that many a man or woman has engaged in sex just to meet a need for being held.
Just a short excerpt of what is an interesting and long article.
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